The return of the black and white minstrels?

This of course is utterly non PC but I cant help thinking that the election of 'Oh Barrack O'Bama' is probably the most misguded, idiotic and dogma driven piece of democracy I've ever lived through.
Yeah I know he's clever, he's slick, he's marketable and good looking but he's still (however you want to look at it) ... Guess who's coming to dinner?

Only in '24', Deep Impact and other Hollywood product do you get smart, tolerant, wise and colour-blind, coloured fellows in charge.

What the neo-liberals in their PC naiivity are too stupid to realise is that these fellows are scripted, directed and often oscar nominated!

In reality it's:

Amin -

Bokassa

Mobutu

Ahmed al Bashir

and God knows how many little Hitlers in the Congo!

Quite frankly the black man, coloured man, yellow man and green man have yet to prove they can do f**k all really but live off the corpses of their own dead and (of course) white man's enterprise!

So, Martin Luther King might have been the poet of tolerance and James Baldwin the peddler of protest but if words is one thing then the gears of ultimate power are a different paragraph altogether!

It's like voting fish to take charge of monkies...sounds great in a movie but in reality... 'cover your heads boys c'os I fear a hard reign really is gonna to fall'.

It's called STOP!

It's a funny old word STOP!
No one seems to understand what it means.
So here's a reminder... STOP means STOP.
Simple isn't it?
STOP the bombings!
STOP the killings!
STOP the stabbings!
STOP the shootings!
STOP the bullying!
STOP the racism
STOP the violence
STOP the crime
STOP the blame
START LIVING!
It's not difficult, it's not intellectual, it's just common f***ing sense.
STOP and START doing something useful with your three score years and ten!!!
Your children will not thank you for turning their world into an abbatoir.

A humourless thing!

One of our more favoured blogs in this blogging world is 'Mike's Pen' - written by a friend of mine...a funny, irreverant, diatribe against all things cant...no sorry that's the Chairman's Report...'Mike's Pen' is a daft eclectic epistle that frames the thoughts of a true English eccentric. No more, no less and he has readers...more than I have!
Yes I'm getting there!
'Mike's Pen' used to feature a character called Mrs Patel whom he claimed offered mail order driving lessons, a book of road maps and breast feeding tips from Nippal...it was a joke and a hugely funny one, taking the piss not out of Mrs Patel and the sub incontinent but out of our stereotypical view of these corner shop princesses. However such has been the the reaction from his readership that he's had to substitute Mrs Patel for a Dickensian charicature of a name and thus lose the joke. What's going on?
How stupid are these third world morons who seem to be happy enough to lig off our benefit system, nab our best housing and turn our streets into no-go areas and yet they can't take a joke...even though they've been taking the piss for years!!

For a small island that's given the world: Cricket, Football, Shakespeare, a sense of humour and the internet the world has given us fuck all back...a bunch of religious retards, raggamuffin refugees and Mullahs with magnums who threaten us with a Jihad should we have a laugh at their expense.
Well you can all shuv it up your....oooh matron!
Because The Chairman's Report is going to champion Mrs Patel from now on ...the hot Hindu with nothing to do....and praise be upon the profit!!!!!!!!

The funniest word in the English language.

SAUSAGES

Bet you can't say it without smiling

Brown welcomes the bombers?

It has to be said that the last two terrorist 'outrages' in Haymarket and Glasgow do offer the new Brown government a fantastic opportunity to prove themselves in the face of adversity.
In fact it's an opportunity so good that anyone could be mistaken for thinking it was rather staged managed. After all, 3 'outrages', 4 utterly incompetent bombers, (one was so hopeless he tried to set himself on fire when Allah failed to materialise and the other tried to punch his way out of the situation when our ever watchful security forces eventually cottoned on to what was going on) but thankfully no one hurt.
All the talk from the government now is that we musn't let this motley crew disturb our way of life...like pantomime horses are real!!!
Followed by 'aren't our security services wonderful?'
No actually they're not
...unless they consist of a drunk and an ambulance driver. If you don't know the story, an ambulance was called to pick up a drunk from Tiger Tiger and it was the ambulance driver who noticed the smoking car (Illegal from today by the way, so if the car was caught today it would have been fined £50 and sent on it's way) but on Friday the police were called and a 'potential' bomb was discovered, not only one but two - a second car ticketed in Cockspur Street had been towed away to Park Lane where it too was found to be stuffed with petrol and nails.
Towed away to Park Lane??? You couldn't make it up.
Excuse me, but in Baghdad these ideological idiots are popping off car bombs every day at the rate of 85 a month! So how come over here two fail to explode consecutively and the Glasgow clowns end up doing more damage to themselves than to anyone else?
Now I'm no supporter of Al Quieda and its' obscene beliefs in a viscious profit and a vengeful God but as a brand it's always had some merit - ruthless, efficient and imaginative, so what's happened?
Unless of course this is Al Quieda Light - same old terrorism but now with all the harmful ingredients taken out but somehow I doubt it, this is too comical, too off pat, too absurd - think about it if you don't believe me - this terrorism bears all the hallmarks of a covert government policy, cumbersome, crass and carried out with Buster Keaton incompetence.
New Prime Minister, New Labour, New Terrorist threat - same old bollocks!

Media Morons

'Have a good evening...see you tomorrow.'

I know I moan a lot, in fact this whole blog seems to be one long moan however some things are worth moaning about, like the over familiarity of newscasters.
For God sake why do they all have to say, 'see you tomorrow' when they know perfectly well they won't - it's not funny, it's absurd? Does anyone actually believe that the grinning halfwit reading the autocues can actually look down the lens of the camera and see them? No,unless of course they're a Sky viewer, then maybe they need to be disabused of the notion, but for the rest of us, those of us who haven't as yet quite tottered into the gutter of gossip, rumour and facile comment it's an insult.
Dumber and dumbest
What happened to newscasters and presenters who wanted to do their job and not be our friends? You wouldn't catch Reginald Bosanquet 'seeing you tomorrow' or Peter Woods or for that matter Corbett Woodall because they knew perfectly well (if we were so inclined) that we would be seeing them - that's the nature of television or are the marketing spivs at the BBC ITV and SKY trying to convince us otherwise!

The grosser grocers!

What the hell are Sainsbury's and Tesco's doing apart from making gross profits and feeding the nation a trolley full of lies and obfuscations? Is there anything on their pre-washed, shrink wrapped, chemically treated shelves that ever had anything to do with the natural world?
No.
The long and the short of it is that these two, (along with the Asda's, Morrissons and Budgens of this world) are largely responsible for the decay of the nation. Their cheap food policy means that their milk is no longer milk, bread is no longer bread, meat no longer meat and vegetables, God their vegetables!!!
So wedded are they to grinding out their industrial muck at a price often below the price they pay for the packaging, they've had to create chemical equivalents of staple foods. Have you tasted their milk? The cows would be utterly ashamed. Their bread comes from a paper mill and as for their meat, chemicalised, flavoured and probably past it's sell by date.
We'll leave the fish because if you knew what their fish were fed on (each other) you'd be sick before you'd even swallowed them.
Viscious, venal and all consuming these disgusting food dumps proliferate with the appetite of a black hole - poisoning the nation for the sake of profit.